A story about a recent trip one of our Explosive Safety guys made down Kandahar way. Enjoy.
"Ok so there I was, I get checked into my tent with 499 of my closest new
buddies. As I drift off to sleep for the night with the soft droning of
C130 engines grinding in the background, with the occasional ear
piercing noise of fighter jets doing a "fly by" to keep us all safe at
night. I am suddenly awakened at 0300 by the big voice, "rocket attack,
rocket attack, rocket attack." As the sirens gurgle a sound straight out
of hell. I just lay there and think, it can't be that bad to be blown
up by a rocket, at least I wouldn't have to hear those damn airplane
engines.
I did manage to get back to sleep. But at 0445, the spring from my
mattress sticks me in the leg, I'm almost sure at that point I am going
to bleed to death. It was just a scratch. So I drag myself out of bed,
slog through 3 inches of mud to the show container. Luckily, the shower
was uneventful. After getting dressed I wander over to the DFAC. It is
amazing how many people they get into the DFAC at one time. Chow is not
too bad, cause I have had worse.
Nevertheless, I get through breakfast and head to the office. Damn,
locked out, they changed the combination since my last visit. Suddenly
I feel the urge to make a hasty exit to the restroom. The closest
restroom is about a block away, too late, have to stop at a
port-o-potty. It is freezing out and .... well, I'm about to bottom
blow. Anyway, it is amazing how cold frozen plastic feels, but it is
better than crapping your pants. Bad thing is, the warmth from your butt
sitting on the frozen plastic melts the ice, then if you sit there long
enough, it re-freezes only to tear every hair off your ass as you try to
stand up. Other than that, it was not a bad trip."
"Ok so there I was, I get checked into my tent with 499 of my closest new
buddies. As I drift off to sleep for the night with the soft droning of
C130 engines grinding in the background, with the occasional ear
piercing noise of fighter jets doing a "fly by" to keep us all safe at
night. I am suddenly awakened at 0300 by the big voice, "rocket attack,
rocket attack, rocket attack." As the sirens gurgle a sound straight out
of hell. I just lay there and think, it can't be that bad to be blown
up by a rocket, at least I wouldn't have to hear those damn airplane
engines.
I did manage to get back to sleep. But at 0445, the spring from my
mattress sticks me in the leg, I'm almost sure at that point I am going
to bleed to death. It was just a scratch. So I drag myself out of bed,
slog through 3 inches of mud to the show container. Luckily, the shower
was uneventful. After getting dressed I wander over to the DFAC. It is
amazing how many people they get into the DFAC at one time. Chow is not
too bad, cause I have had worse.
Nevertheless, I get through breakfast and head to the office. Damn,
locked out, they changed the combination since my last visit. Suddenly
I feel the urge to make a hasty exit to the restroom. The closest
restroom is about a block away, too late, have to stop at a
port-o-potty. It is freezing out and .... well, I'm about to bottom
blow. Anyway, it is amazing how cold frozen plastic feels, but it is
better than crapping your pants. Bad thing is, the warmth from your butt
sitting on the frozen plastic melts the ice, then if you sit there long
enough, it re-freezes only to tear every hair off your ass as you try to
stand up. Other than that, it was not a bad trip."
wonder = Wander?
ReplyDeleteYou need to get home! You're grammer and spelling are going down hill. And your non PC way of saying things. Get home.